1. “At least they came in second place.”
According to our men, there might as well not even be a silver medal at the Olympics. Second is dirt. Don’t mention it.
2. “The way they were playing, they didn’t deserve to win anyway.”
Never insult his “boys”. Even though he knows the truth deep down, this approach may trigger a recap of series highlights. Listening to that is probably more painful than sitting through an actual game.
3. “We are out of beer.”
Keep a secret stash on ice, for bad moments like this. Don’t even wait for him to ask – crack it open and put it in his hand immediately after the clock stops. Like a heart attack victim, most are likely to survive if treated within the first 4 minutes.
4. “Now that your team is out, you can work on cleaning out the garage.”
Do not mention this wonderful reality for at least 48-hrs or it may backfire. Your list of to-do’s should be presented in a casual way, when he has begun to regain signs of life. Premature nagging may lead to extended procrastination which is bad news for the rosebush that needs to be planted.
5. “Oh by the way, we are going to my mother’s house for dinner tonight.”
For at least 24-hrs post-losing game, avoid all contact with in-laws and your extended family. His delicate condition may have paralyzed his communication “filters”. The last thing you need is him telling Aunt Ronda that she is getting fat and that her husband is an alcoholic.
6. “Sorry, not tonight, I have my period.”
Make it happen girls – under any circumstance. Take one for the team.
So, ladies dating Chelsea fans, get ready to give it up tomorrow, thanks for understanding...
EmoticonEmoticon